Fab Five?

It has been five days since I have left home. There are moments when I feel lonely, moments when I miss the comforts of my bed, and moments when I miss waiting for mom and yeah, just wait.


Almost one week down, all I got so far were email replies and a realistic assessment of my credentials. I woke up feeling a bit displaced. I'm questioning once more what am I doing here. Yeah, I know my faith needs a little working up. I better brush this feeling off after all that's been happening to me.


Honestly, the events last Monday injected doubt and fear in my mind. However, I am trying to stand still and really choose to move on. There are moments though where it catches up on me. Scary, I know. Being held up, even just for 5 minutes, at the Immigration Office is no joke. It's like being detained like a criminal. I hated the feeling. But thank God, I was allowed to push through anyway.


When I got back home that Monday night, my friend told me that I am not too welcome to stay at the place since the housemates wanted me to pay rent. It was freaking me out because I only had enough money to sustain my needs. Nonetheless, I tried to brush my fears aside.


Tuesday, I started sending out emails. I tried to get in touch with Angelina and I am glad that she immediately replied. It was nice to hear something from her and I have to admit that she gave me hope that I could make it here. Seeing Cleo gave me peace. It was so nice to see her. Nothing beats being with the people you love.


Wednesday came, surprises came. The President of NCS and Anthony Lau finally replied to me. Again, no assurances of a job were presented to me but receiving mails from them encouraged me to try harder and to just keep on trying. 


Thursday was really funny. I had a LONG day. I went to Orchard along with Robert to meet Joel and head to an agency. Yes, I am thinking of alternatives already. The agent gave me a realistic assessment of my CV. It's tough taking it all in and remain positive but God allowed me to control my emotions. Thank you for that. It was heartbreaking that the agent made me feel like choosing to teach was a wrong decision because it made my chances of working here in Sg slimmer. I took it in but still I believe that God has greater things in store for me so I'm moving on and I'm brushing it off.


After the disheartening event, we - Joel, Robert, and I headed to Serangoon where Joel stays. It was a blessing we did that because we had a fellowship and it encouraged me to move on. We separated after about 3 hours. On the way back, I bumped into Aizza, my grade 1 partner. It was just so random and unexpected but boy, I'm glad I saw her.


The whole day my phone kept on ringing, not because of bookings for job interviews but because of friends calling and getting in touch to encourage me and extend some sort of help. I spoke with Henry, Eugene, and Katrina. They were all offering a helping hand in there own little ways. I praise God for that.


I traveled all the way to Sembawang to meet Bianca. My baby is now a lady. We had dinner and bonded over yogurt. I missed her. Seeing Ate Joy and Kuya Popit was a blessing. They were very accommodating and assuring. I felt so loved and safe around them. 


I went home tired but happy. Though I'm surrounded with uncertainty, my heart is filled with peace. I continue to pray to God for direction and guidance. May He lead me to the right employers. May He use me to bless the people I love. May bring Him joy and honor in the things that I do. 


Life goes on. Another day to face uncertainty, but I'll face it. I'll move on. I'll go ahead. God is with me. I'll do my part and I believe that He will crown my efforts and He will never put me in a situation where I will not excel and shine for God's glory.


xoxo