I seriously don't know where I am now. I used to have plans. I thought I already knew what I wanted to do. Then, Boom! Complications arise. I often face complications feeling so courageous but this one is a different story. It's like I'm pushed to the wall and I am trying to be brave and to hold on to my face but somehow it gets to me. Like every single day, it tests me. It is waiting for me to breakdown to the core! It's tearing me to pieces.
Today was a humbling experience. I never asked a big help from my best friend but today, I just did! And now, I feel so helpless. I do not like depending to people that much. But today, I had to. It is painstakingly odd for me to reach out and ask help but I'm glad my best friend was there to catch me this time. Without questions, without second thoughts, he said his piece and gave an offer. Nobody has ever done that to me other than my parents. What have I ever done to deserve this?
I feel like I am down the dumps but right now, while I am at this messed up state, I realized that I am so blessed. I never thought that my best friend would do this for me. He may never laid his life for me, but lending me this extra hand means so much to me. At this point when I felt like I was drowning, he was there. God knew I needed to hold on to someone right now and He sent me one!
Life may seem pathetic right now but I am not losing hope. God's grace abounds in my life and that's just what I need to keep me going. I can do this. My God is gracious. My God is more than enough for me. Yes, He definitely is. Lost I may be right now, but I know that every thing will be alright soon. That is something I am really looking forward to.
